"We really want a house - but have $0 in savings"

Molly and Jason, a couple aged 45 and 46 with a two-year-old daughter, face significant financial challenges despite a combined household income of $142,000 annually. Their savings stand at zero, with a net worth of $4,000 and a debt of $46,000. Molly describes their situation as living paycheck to paycheck with virtually no savings, actively trying to improve their financial standing, particularly after the increase in daycare costs which frequently overdraws her account. The couple maintains entirely separate finances. Molly manages most household bills, which are in her name, while Jason, the primary earner, sends her money multiple times a month via Venmo. This arrangement leads to Molly often having to request funds, sometimes negotiating amounts based on Jason's checking account balance, and frequently facing the risk of late fees. She finds this process frustrating and confusing, describing it as "scrambling" and acknowledges her difficulty with budgeting software due to a lack of clarity on incoming funds. Jason admits he doesn't track his spending frequently and has been largely disengaged from the financial management, stating he hasn't focused on it. A recent discussion about their finances highlighted their communication breakdown. Molly expressed anger and resignation, feeling that conversations about money are fruitless and lead to no clarity, while Jason becomes defensive and shuts down. This typical cycle results in no decisions being made and the issues resurfacing weeks later. An analysis of Jason's Rocket Money account revealed 18 subscriptions totaling $4,368 per year, an amount neither of them was fully aware of. Molly also expressed distrust regarding Jason's past financial decisions, specifically his undisclosed stock market investments, including options trading, which he undertook without her full knowledge. Jason admitted he kept these ventures private, hoping for better news to share. Both Molly and Jason feel disconnected from money and each other regarding finances. They recognized that they are still spending as if they were single, struggling to adapt to the financial realities of having a family. Molly feels overwhelmed and tunes out when trying to unravel their financial "disaster," a common reaction to feeling incompetent. Their financial goals include not wanting to be "poor," aiming to be "well off," and aspiring to retire early. They also share a vision of investing in multi-family real estate and buying their first home, but these remain largely dreams without concrete plans. Molly has researched loan options, but Jason admitted they are in the "research stage" with "very little" actual planning. This discrepancy between dreams and action leads to a feeling of being stuck. Reviewing their numbers, Molly noted the debt of $46,640 was much higher than she anticipated, primarily due to two vehicles and $25,000 in credit card debt, mostly in her name due to Jason's poor credit. This has led to significant resentment for Molly, who bears the emotional and practical burden of managing this debt. She feels she's "living her mother's role," where her mother also took on financial responsibility and resentment in her past marriage. Jason acknowledged Molly's resentment and his own detachment, agreeing that he needs to improve. Jason's childhood was marked by a lack of financial discussion, growing up in a communal "cult" where money was pooled. He received little financial advice from his father, who passed away when Jason was 15. This upbringing contributed to his current lack of emotional expression and disengagement with financial planning. Molly's childhood experiences involved financial struggles after her parents' divorce, witnessing her mother take on extra jobs and refusing alimony to regain control. She also observed her father accumulate credit card debt and eventually file for bankruptcy, shaping her negative view of money and a tendency to live for the moment in her younger years, later shifting to a desire for more responsibility. Molly expressed unhappiness despite having achieved her desires of a partner and child, feeling a constant state of holding on tightly and waiting for "the other shoe to drop." She directly told Jason her need for control over their finances, stating she doesn't trust him to be responsible. Jason offered to take on more bills and suggested a joint account, which Molly agreed could build trust, starting with weekly financial meetings. The idea of a joint account where the bulk of their income is deposited first, and then allocated to investments and savings before discretionary spending, was proposed as a solution. They recognized that their current fixed costs are at 77% of their income, well above the recommended 50-60%, leaving little for investments (3%) and savings (1%). They identified several actionable steps: selling their truck to pay down credit card debt, which would significantly reduce interest and debt repayment time; reducing subscriptions; and cutting down on daily discretionary spending like coffee and lunches. The conversation revealed their ability to make hard decisions, such as moving to a cheaper rental, giving the coach confidence in their potential for change. The coach emphasized the urgency of their situation, stating that their income has enabled their financial sloppiness. He advised against immediate plans for buying a house or real estate investing, and paying for their daughter's college, until their personal finances, including a substantial emergency fund and robust retirement savings, are firmly established. He stressed that without a plan, their dreams are mere fantasies. Both expressed a desire for a joint account, realizing the urgency of consolidating their finances. Jason admitted to apathy and laziness regarding financial management at home. Molly acknowledged her fear of being with someone lazy and her role in perpetuating the dynamic by answering for Jason. In a follow-up, Molly and Jason reported significant progress. They experienced an "emotional hangover" but found the deep personal discussion helpful. They now understand the urgency of saving and are committed to tightening expenses, including selling the truck to pay off a large portion of credit card debt by June. They have started regular financial meetings, opened a joint bank account, and rolled over old retirement accounts. Molly also found a new, higher-paying job after a setback. Jason has taken on more responsibility, asking questions and increasing his retirement contributions, with both feeling more like a team. They expressed gratitude for the experience, which provided them with a plan and a sense of forward momentum.