Lead with fire | Jeremy Qualls | TEDxMurfreesboro

The speaker recounts a pivotal childhood accident in 1982 where, at four years old, he was severely burned by gasoline. His older brother's quick action saved him, but the incident left him with burns over 30% of his body. Despite a perilous recovery, he survived, and his father's words upon his release from the hospital, "Son, you're going to be a leader one day and I want you to lead with fire," became a guiding principle. This "leading with fire" meant two things: giving 100% effort in any role and not letting the accident become an excuse or a crutch, but rather using it to help others. His father, a man of "country logic" and unique sayings, communicated profound life lessons through seemingly simple Post-it notes. The speaker shares three key lessons learned from these notes. The first, received during his high school basketball career, was "You shot the ball great tonight in warm-ups. Be ready." This was followed years later, after a career-high scoring game, by a Post-it that read, "You could have rebounded better and passed the ball more. Be ready." These notes taught him the importance of balancing encouragement with constructive criticism. His first Post-it note as a head coach, at the young age of 22, stated, "Jeremy, true power only comes to those that do not seek it. Be ready." This was a lesson in humility and effective leadership. His team's poor performance in his first two years highlighted his misguided pursuit of personal glory over player development. He learned that true leaders share the spotlight, or better yet, point it towards their team. This was exemplified by Coach Jimmy Gentry's approach: asking "How can I help you today?", expressing pride and love, offering thanks, and emphasizing "we" over "I." The second significant Post-it note, received when he became a principal at 32, read, "If you're going to err, err on the side of humans. Be ready." This guided him to prioritize empathy and understanding over rigid adherence to policies. He recounts a situation where a teacher reported a student for a dress code violation. Upon discovering the student's home had burned down, the speaker intervened, providing aid and fostering a new school culture that focused on understanding the "why" behind actions before disciplinary measures. This shift dramatically reduced disciplinary referrals. The third and final lesson came during his second coaching stint, with the note, "Jeremy, turn your scars into stars. Be ready." This encouraged him to learn from past mistakes and challenges. He shares the story of Nick, a highly intelligent but angry player who quit the team. The speaker's initial reaction was dismissive, driven by his own ego. However, Nick's later explanation of his difficult home life revealed the speaker's blindness to the human element, a consequence of his pursuit of power. Nick's subsequent growth and leadership, even in a different sport, ultimately taught the speaker a profound lesson about true leadership, culminating in a game-winning play where Nick, not the coach, orchestrated the strategy. The speaker concludes by urging the audience to write an encouraging Post-it note to someone, ending it with "Be ready."