Très thaï pour la France, trop française pour la Thaïlande

The guest, Ploy, shares her unique life story, having been born in Thailand and moving to France at age six. She is now 36 years old and splits her time between Bangkok and the Isaan region, specifically Sisaket, where her grandmother lived. Ploy recounts spending her early years in Bangkok and often visiting her grandmother in the rice fields of Isaan during holidays. She last visited her ancestral village during the Thai-Cambodian border conflict, near Preah Vihear temple, about 50 km from the disputed area. During this visit, she spent 24 hours helping her family relocate to a refuge in Ubon Ratchathani, a region further inland. Her family was initially reluctant to leave their homes due to the fear of theft and the deep connection they had to their land, where several generations had lived. Ploy describes a harrowing experience of driving through the night, arriving at 7 AM to find gas stations closed, and then hearing a bomb explode just 1 km away. This moment, she explains, was indescribable and immediately made her think of her daughter. Her family eventually agreed to move, with 12-13 people, including a three-month-old baby, cramming into a pickup truck with minimal belongings. She notes that some men stayed behind in the village to guard against looters. Ploy moved to France because her mother married a Frenchman, Norbert, whom Ploy considers her father. Her biological father, though he recognized her and gave her his surname, left shortly after her birth because he wanted a son and was not interested in parental responsibilities. He was a policeman in Bangkok and is now retired in Suphanburi. Ploy expresses that she was very happy to have Norbert as a father figure, as she had grown up without one. He taught her French words and showered her with gifts, including Nutella, which they initially stored in the fridge because they didn't know how to eat it. The decision to move to France was made between her mother and Norbert. Her mother had visited France beforehand to assess the situation, facing a major cultural and linguistic shift in her thirties. A key factor in the move was the opportunity for Ploy to receive a better education in France, with access to English, European culture, and history. Arriving in France at age six, Ploy didn't fully grasp the magnitude of the move. She only spoke Thai at the time. She quickly learned French, becoming almost bilingual within three to four months. She attributes this rapid learning to being completely uninhibited at that age, viewing it as play rather than study. She was immediately enrolled in a French school, starting in a combined CP/CE1 class. Her first day of school was memorable for her attire: a denim jacket, denim skirt, and ankle boots, inspired by her idol, Michael Jackson. Ploy did not experience significant discrimination for being Asian during her schooling in France, other than occasional jokes like being called "Mulan." She grew up in Cagnes-sur-Mer, near Nice, surrounded by her French family, which helped her feel integrated. Her mother, however, faced more challenges adapting but demonstrated incredible mental strength, immediately taking French classes and working. Despite the cultural shift, her mother continued to cook Thai food daily, bringing a taste of home to Ploy's upbringing. Finding Thai ingredients was initially difficult, requiring trips to Asian markets or her mother smuggling fermented fish in her luggage. Ploy spent her summer holidays in Thailand, alternating between Bangkok and Sisaket. In her early years, she still felt fully Thai, but her metabolism had adapted to French conditions. She recalls getting sick after drinking tap water like her Thai cousins, something she would not have done in France. She spoke both central Thai and Isaan Thai fluently with her cousins. However, as she and her mother increasingly spoke French at home for integration purposes, Ploy's Thai language skills gradually diminished. This became a source of regret for both Ploy and her aunt. At 26, Ploy resigned from her job in luxury design in Paris, where she felt burned out by the "metro-boulot-dodo" routine. She traveled through Asia, including Thailand and Vietnam. In Vietnam, while watching a sunset with a friend who had also quit her job, Ploy realized she didn't want to return to her previous life. She felt something was missing and that "there was better elsewhere." She returned to Thailand for a few months to find a job before officially moving. Finding a job was easy, but she faced the challenge of having a French education (a business school degree) but being offered a Thai salary, which she found frustrating. She initially worked in import/export for two weeks, then as a marketing director for a luxury cosmetics brand, and briefly at the Franco-Thai Chamber of Commerce. Working with Thai colleagues was challenging due to cultural differences and language barriers. Ploy found herself constantly having to justify why her Thai wasn't perfect, despite being educated as a French person. She felt a significant cultural gap, having been "stuck" at a five-year-old's understanding of Thai culture and language. This led to a period of self-doubt and a loss of confidence. Ploy eventually transitioned into photography, a long-time passion. She initially pursued it as a hobby but was encouraged by a talented British photographer named Ivan Cohen, who helped her connect with UN Women. This led to her career as a documentary photographer, working with UN Women in the Asia-Pacific region. She traveled to the Philippines and Cambodia, as well as extensively within Thailand. In the Philippines, she covered a unique story: the only all-female police station, located in a city called Maria. This initiative was implemented by the local police chief. Ploy found the experience incredible, noting that these women handled everything from paperwork to fieldwork, often being mothers and sisters themselves. She captured some of her best photos there, including five women on a beach with large guns, which she described as powerful. She believes a similar all-female police force could be possible in Thailand, provided they are well-trained. She also notes that Thailand has a high number of female CEOs globally, despite a prevailing paternalistic culture, suggesting women here often have a stronger sense of responsibility and are more hardworking. Ploy's French parents are now retired and planning to move to Thailand, having already bought a house in Rangsit. Ploy is married to a Frenchman she met in Thailand, and they have a four-year-old daughter who attends a bilingual English-French school. The most difficult aspect of her first year back in Thailand at 26 was the feeling of not being integrated and the challenges in her relationships with other Thais. She had taken Thai classes in Paris but found that without constant practice, the language faded. She describes a period of identity crisis, questioning who she was—French or Thai. She now feels she has found that "missing piece." She still experiences cultural misunderstandings, especially in diplomatic settings where strict protocols for respect and distance are observed. Taxi drivers often express surprise that she looks Thai but doesn't speak the language fluently. While she can recognize Thai sounds, she finds it difficult to articulate them perfectly. She describes her current Thai as "correct" for daily conversations but struggles with specialized vocabulary, often resorting to English in her professional life. Beyond her work with UN Women, Ploy is the founder and managing director of Resume Creative Studio, which offers photography and video production, including documentary work, studio shoots, and outdoor photography. She also recently took over the management of "Hopfer Fair," a quarterly vendor community event that donates a portion of its profits to the Mercy Center association. Balancing her demanding career with family life is challenging, as she travels frequently for work. She acknowledges the support of her husband and their Thai nanny. She recently had a period of intense work, working nonstop for over two months. Her New Year's resolution for 2026 is to try and "let go" more and spend more time with her family. When asked what she misses about France, Ploy mentions cheese, French gastronomy, culture, and landscapes, particularly the combination of sea and mountains where she grew up. Traveling to France now with her family is expensive, with round-trip tickets costing around 4000 euros. Finally, Ploy wishes for happiness in the future, reflecting a Thai philosophy of living happily day by day. She believes this is the essence of Thai thought.