Long-Term Commitment — Some Things You Have to Know | Yan William | TEDxNACIS Shanghai Youth

The speaker begins by introducing a friend, "Little Dumpling," showing a picture of her as a cute, aggressive, but healthy and fit individual. The speaker recounts a personal experience where a promise made to their mother to care for "Little Dumpling" lasted only 3 to 5 days, highlighting how this incident reflects a common issue among young people: overconfidence and making promises too early. This leads to the central topic of "long-term commitment," defined as a serious promise requiring constant effort over an extended period, often associated with love or romance, though such promises are frequently not kept. The core question posed is whether long-term commitment is reliable, to which the speaker firmly answers no, explaining this through three reasons: external issues, self-caused problems, and unexpected incidents. First, **external issues** occur when the recipient of the promise acts offensively or harms the promisor, causing them to break their word. An example is given of "Little William" who promised to attend a party but decided not to after a friend claimed the host was spreading bad rumors about him. Despite appearing to be a victim, William still broke his promise, and the information from the friend could even be a rumor itself, highlighting the potential for complexity and individual responsibility. Second, **self-caused problems** arise when the promisor's own problematic actions prevent them from keeping their promise. "Kevin" is used as an example; he promised teammates to finish his part of a project by Friday but became addicted to video games, neglecting his commitment and eventually being removed from the group. This illustrates how personal choices can directly lead to the failure of a long-term commitment. Third, **unexpected incidents** refer to unforeseen events unrelated to the plan or the individual that disrupt schedules and prevent promises from being kept. The example of "George" is provided, who was on his way to a seminar but broke his leg, forcing him to miss it and thus break his promise to attend. Even if unintended, the responsibility for the unfulfilled promise still falls on the individual who made it. Despite these challenges, the speaker offers solutions to make long-term commitments more achievable. The first is to **think before making promises**, specifically suggesting a 24-hour reflection period for long-term commitments to minimize potential harm. The second solution is to **treat commitments as goals** that must be achieved. The speaker argues that while external circumstances may change, an unwavering commitment to a goal can help overcome disruptions and obstacles, fostering a sense of achievement that aids in following through. In conclusion, the speaker emphasizes that long-term commitments are valuable but must be taken very seriously. The advice "Don't make promises that you cannot keep," attributed to Elizabeth Hoy, is cited as a guiding principle, urging everyone to treat commitments seriously and uphold their word.