My Dad And I Haven’t Spoken In 3 Years, Now He Wants Money

A 40-year-old man is seeking advice regarding his inheritance and a claim from his father. His grandmother passed away, and after a two-year legal battle initiated by a second cousin, he will inherit her estate, estimated to be between $300,000 and $500,000. During this process, his father spent $60,000 of his own money. The father is now pressuring the son, through his mother, to repay this $60,000. Adding to the complexity, the son recalls a past incident where his father promised to pay for his master's degree if he stayed on the West Coast for college. The father reneged on this promise, leaving the son to pay off $150,000 in student loans. The core question is whether the son is obligated to repay the $60,000 his father spent on the will contest, especially considering the broken promise regarding his education. The advice given emphasizes direct communication between father and son, bypassing the mother as an intermediary. The son is encouraged to view the situation through the lens of achieving peace of mind, rather than solely financial return. While acknowledging the father's actions, the consensus is that the son is not legally or morally obligated to repay the $60,000. The father’s untrustworthiness is highlighted, and the son is advised to receive his inheritance graciously. A potential "soul tax" payment is mentioned as a personal choice for peace, but it's cautioned that this likely won't end the father's financial demands. The advice strongly suggests that any repayment should only occur after a direct, adult conversation between father and son, which has not happened in three years due to a past conflict. The son is praised for his integrity.