
The Power of Confidence | Ha-Anh Vu | TEDxBISHCMC Youth
Audio Summary
AI Summary
Good evening. It's a pleasure to be here, especially as it's my birthday, and this is a wonderful gift. My name is Haang Vu. I was born and raised in Hanoi, Vietnam. At 18, I moved to the UK for boarding school and university, subsequently pursuing a modeling career in London. In 2009, I returned to Vietnam and continued my modeling work, also appearing on television shows like "Vietnam's Next Top Model," where I served as a host and judge. I’ve also judged and mentored for shows like "You Think You Can Dance," Miss Universe, and Miss World, helping contestants further their careers.
I believe in giving back and often speak at schools and universities, and engage with people outside of formal settings to share inspiration. This is particularly important to me because I was a very awkward and shy girl in high school. I was tall, gangly, and felt unattractive, leading to constant bullying. People often assume that physical attributes make confidence easy, but that wasn't my experience. Despite my current career, which might suggest high confidence, I'm actually quite introverted and prefer not to speak in large crowds.
After years of shyness, at 21, I decided I couldn't stay in my shell any longer. I started by attending small student-led events in the UK, pushing myself to initiate conversations. This small step of saying "hi" and getting to know people felt surprisingly manageable and rewarding, leading me to make a friend that day. Gradually, through these experiences, I began to build confidence by stepping outside my comfort zone and engaging with others.
My career has involved hosting major events and interacting with notable figures. I recall hosting an event with David Beckham. While people see him as a superstar, our conversation delved into relatable topics like parenting. As a new mother, I was interested in how he and Victoria balanced their demanding careers with family life. He shared that despite their busy schedules, they prioritized their children, ensuring they drove them to school and were present for them, aiming for their kids to be proud of their working parents. This interaction reinforced for me that everyone, regardless of their public persona, shares common human experiences and can relate to each other.
The key to confidence, I believe, is understanding this universal relatability. When you feel nervous approaching someone, remember that they might also feel nervous. By overcoming that initial fear and simply saying "hi," you open the door to connection. These simple interactions, pushing your boundaries incrementally, reveal that people are generally kind and willing to share stories. The worry of bothering others or saying the wrong thing is often unfounded. Connecting on a basic level and discussing everyday topics can uncover more similarities than you might imagine.
Building confidence is an ongoing process, not a destination. While external validation can be nice, the true foundation comes from within, often rooted in family values. Coming from a family of writers, a filmmaker father (who worked on "King Kong"), and a journalist mother, I had to forge my own path. I pursued business in England, not initially intending to enter modeling or the arts. Traveling away from home prompted introspection about my identity. My grandmother's parting words before I left for England were crucial: "People love you because you are kindhearted. Never forget that. The world is your oyster. You can make a good living, be helpful, and useful. But never forget being kind; that's who you are." These values from my family are my greatest strength, especially during moments of doubt.
Confidence is powerful because it allows you to make friends, build future career contacts, and make an impact. However, for me, the most profound aspect of confidence is the ability to be genuinely happy for others' successes. In fields where competition is emphasized, it's vital to cultivate inner confidence and happiness that allows you to celebrate others without feeling diminished.
For those who find it difficult to connect, I advise bravery and gradual boundary-pushing. Even successful business leaders can feel nervous in public settings. Simply projecting good energy, introducing yourself with a friendly "Hi, nice to meet you," is a great way to start. Physical presentation also plays a role; grooming, dressing well, and presenting yourself in a presentable manner can boost your self-assurance. A confident walk, with energy and a deep breath, conveys presence. When you project genuine happiness and confidence, it’s infectious.
Having hobbies and travel experiences provides more conversational topics, helping you find common ground with others. You don't need to be an expert in everything; asking questions and listening attentively is often more effective than trying to be a know-it-all. Genuine curiosity and kindness draw people in.
Strengthening core values is essential. In a world where fitting in can feel important, especially at a young age, it's crucial to embrace your identity. I chose to keep my Vietnamese name, Haang, despite the initial difficulty, because it's who I am. Embracing your differences and your heritage makes you stand out and connect with others on a deeper level. Remember your core values, family, culture, and unique qualities – they make you special.
Confidence can be learned through soft skills development. Participating in activities that challenge you, even if you're not entirely comfortable, provides practice. My first public singing performance was terrifying, but each subsequent attempt became easier. The opportunity to practice public speaking now is invaluable for your future. Pushing yourself outside your comfort zone, even slightly, leads to learning, enjoyment, and new connections.
Social media presents a complex challenge. While popularity and likes can offer a temporary boost, they shouldn't define your worth. I've learned to navigate this, recognizing social media as a communication tool rather than a sole validation source. Dealing with negative comments and online trolls can be incredibly difficult, even for someone established. I've personally experienced this, and it's been a challenging period. However, my family's love and support, the innocent laughter of my children, and my husband's encouragement have been my anchor.
Remember that negative comments online do not define your worth. True happiness and confidence come from genuine connections, your craft, and the positive energy you receive from helping others. My work with organizations like UNICEF and Operation Smile, and my efforts to help victims of Agent Orange, were driven by a desire to spread joy and assist vulnerable people. These acts, no matter how small – opening a door, offering a compliment, helping a friend – create ripples of kindness.
My childhood dream was to bring happiness to people. Now, I realize that through acts of kindness, we can inspire, connect, and gain confidence by being good to one another. The power of confidence, for me, lies in lifting each other up, fostering shared joy, and building a beautiful, positive life together. Thank you.