Harvard Business Review

Why You’re Bad at Disagreeing (And How to Fix It)

Julia Mson, author of "How to Disagree Better," emphasizes that constructive disagreement isn't about reaching agreement or consensus, but about fostering a dynamic where parties wish to engage with each other again. This is a crucial skill for organizations because the very reason for forming teams is to benefit from diverse opinions. As William Wrigley Jr. famously stated, "When two men in business always agree, one of them is unnecessary." Many teams struggle with disagreement, either by not disagreeing enough or by doing so in unhealthy ways. When individuals don't feel their ideas will be received with appreciation, they tend to stay silent. Leaders often advise on the importance of disagreement in abstract terms, like benefiting the company, but the personal cost of speaking up against a superior or team member can be immediate and significant, creating a tension between future benefits and present risk. Personality and cultural differences also play a role, though disagreement, like musical ability, is a skill that can be improved with training.